Dads and Grey’s Anatomy
I love DVRs – but that’s beside the point. I am always too tired to watch my favorite shows when they air, so I record them and watch them later. Last night I watched this week’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy. What a tear-jerker.
Christina tells George at the end of the show about the Dead Dads Club and she is sorry that he had to join it. I’m a member of that club too. What was even more jarring to my emotions was the fact that this episode aired within the week of the anniversary of my father’s birthday. (He would have been 78 on January 15.) Also, the scene where George’s mother and family were standing around his father as he died catapulted me back to the same scene with my mother and family in November of 1993 when my father passed away from pulmonary fibrosis.
It was just an excellent, excellent episode. To me, there was nothing tacky or sensational about it – just top notch writing and acting.
And it made me feel. It made me think. I like TV or movies that produce that effect.
There’s rarely much time that goes by that I don’t think of my father and the profound impact he had on who I am today, and I miss him dearly. Even after 13 years.
He was a highly intelligent, strong man, successful, and a good father who tried hard to give us every advantage in life that he could. In the end, he said he didn’t think he was such a great dad, and that he did things wrong. Well, what parent doesn’t do something wrong? But he did so many things right for us and he gave us so many opportunities to succeed in life, that if we failed, it wasn’t due to our parenting but to our choices we children made as adults.
My father (as the story goes) fought hard in the early sixties to keep custody of my two older brothers and me. It was a devastating time for my father and he did get custody of three toddlers, ages 1,2, and 3. And he was a single father for a couple years before he married the woman who I know as my mother.
Monday was his birthday. My mom and I chatted on the phone and lovingly disagreed about how old he would have been. (It’s easy – he was born in 1929.) And just about everything I do today is, in one way or another, the result of the love of my father and his presence in my life.
At the end of Gray’s Anatomy, George says he doesn’t know how to exist in a world where his father isn’t. Christine says, well, that never goes away.
Don’t I know it. But I’m managing – quite well – and my father would be proud.
Happy Birthday, Dad.